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There are a lot of misconceptions about stay at home Moms. Some people say that stay at home Moms have it so, so rough, while others think that being a stay at home Mom is easy peasy.
Both views are a little off, in my opinion. I have found that it’s really easy for SAHM’s to lose their sense of purpose. I’m really ashamed to say this, but there have been times that I feel extremely embarrassed to say that I’m a stay at home Mom. Many times, I feel unimportant, like what I do doesn’t really matter.
Truth is, this couldn’t be further from the truth. Here are some things that I’ve been doing to restore my sense of purpose:
Talking Up My Role as Wife and Mama
A lot of times, I fall into the trap of saying I’m just a Wife and Mom. Really, there’s no such thing as just. The roles that we play are endless. We are important, we are shaping our child’s world, creating a haven for our families and laying down a solid foundation. Us Mamas are the glue that makes this whole crazy operation stick! Whenever I start to feel insignificant, I choose to talk up my job. Sort of like a self-given pep talk. It sounds cheesy but it really works and gives clarity to the situation.
Taking Care of Myself
I am the first one to be found in her leopard print jammie leggings with a “Mama bun” and slippers. After all, no one sees me anyways, right? Um, wrong. My job as a stay at home Mama deserves the right dress code. Even if that is just upgrading to yoga pants and light makeup. π The biggest pit that I’ve gotten myself into as a SAHM is that of letting myself go. Not dressing right, eating right or even doing simple activities that I love because I’m busy investing into the lives of others.
I’ve made a choice recently to start taking care of myself again. Bubble baths, a chapter in a good book, tea, dressing in something that makes me feel great,etc. I’m noticing such a difference and I’m starting to feel like I have a place in my world.
Putting God First
I try to get together with God first thing in the morning. This helps me see my role as Wife and Mama through His eyes and I can see myself as loved and valued. I think God is the only one who can tell us who we are and if we can’t see the purpose in our lives, we can ask Him to help us see. There have been so many times that my eyes have been just muddled with lies, so badly that I can’t even hold my head high. Spending time with God on a consistent basis has been the one thing that has cleared the fog. I currently follow the She Reads Truth studies. My quiet time is not perfect, I get interrupted about 10 times,but I’m getting in the Word and that’s what matters! π
Making a To-Do List Each Day
It’s no secret that I adore my lists and routines. A to-do list can help you physically see what you accomplish every day and it can give you a direction for what needs to be done. It shows you that you do have goals and that you are fully capable of completing them. Even on my bad days, I can still say that I did what needed to be done. It gives my days purpose!
Creating a Mission Statement and Goals
A mission statement and goals are two totally different things that have a similar end result. Your mission statement is what you’re all about. It’s the heart behind your life’s mission and conveys the character traits you want the world to see. Your goals are the steps you take to fulfill your mission statement.
I think having a mission statement helps you see the value behind what you’re doing. It gives that little “aha!” moment of, “so this is why I’m here!”. Setting goals gives you concrete evidence that you are, in fact, doing a great job.
Let’s hear from you! Have you ever felt like your life lacked purpose? How did you choose to fight those feelings?
Katie Lowry
I love this post! I totally relate to what you said! Great blog!
Cate H
Thanks, Katie! <3
Brittany
I can totally relate! I thought that being a stay at home mom would be easy, but I was wrong. It helps to know that other moms struggle just like I do and don’t have it together any more than I do. God has been working on me to surrender to motherhood. I especially liked your idea about a mission statement! I have found that spending time with God and putting on makeup and getting dressed really help as well. Thanks for the post!
Bunmi
This is really helpful! I am a new stay at home mom and one other thing that’s still hard for me that wasn’t addressed here is missing your work. Today when I missed it, I just decided to not look back.
Cate H
Lol! I’d love to have covered that but I still miss my old career from time to time! That’s great advice-to not look back. Thank you! <3
Priscilla Ahmed
I’m a stay home mom for 10 years now, sometimes I really feel I’m not fulfilling purpose, reading this has really encouraged me to have a mission statement and set goals to achieve them. I also need to work on my relationship with God, recently I just became lazy reading and studying my Bible. God bless you for this article.
Cate H
Thank you so much for your kind words, Priscilla! π I’m so happy I could inspire you.
Noni
I recently became a SAHM again after having our 2nd baby. I have been feeling like i have lost who i am coz of comparing myself w other women my age who have good jobs or careers. I like the part where you mentioned that we need to ask God whats our purpose is.
Having alone times w Him r sooo important, i need to make that a priority. Thank you!
Cate H
Hi, Noni! I hear you! It can be so hard for me as well, especially when most girls my age are just starting their careers! I just keep telling myself that our jobs as stay at home Moms matter JUST as much as those who work outside the home. π I pray God shows you His purpose for you in this season! Thanks for reading! <3
Amy
This is so helpful as we just moved to a new city and I feel off. Iβd like to add that I like listening to sermons or daily devotional cds in the car! It helps me get a more consistent time with God hearing the truth.
I also joined a Bible study because having a community of women who love the Lord and I can serve gives me great purpose. Plus itβs some socializing to look forward to!